Video Games and Other Things

Yesterday, I died a dozen times fighting a powerful magician. Usually at least once when I"m playing video games the thought will enter my mind, "why am I doing this?" And almost every time the question is dismissed as quickly as it comes by some inner desire that really needs to keep playing. Yesterday was no exception, the question came and went as I worked my way through this dungeon, fighting shades and magicians. Saving and reloading, saving and reloading. I've never been much of a gamer but I've dabbled enough to experience at least a little of the thrill in it.

There really is a sort of pleasure, in video games that is different from any other pleasure. Today I was meditating on that, trying to trace it to it's root. Questions like those below went flashing through my mind.

What is a video game?

How are video games different from other things?

Why do people play them?

Before the technology existed that allowed for video games, was their some other activity which people participated in as a substitute?

what are the differences between playing solo from mult-iplayer from online play?

What is that thrill or pleasure that comes from video games?

With these questions came thoughts, images, answers. Games I've played, experiences I had and books I've read. I don't include all of those, they are a cloud. There's a reason we have thought bubbles not thought squares because most everyone's thoughts are disjointed, disorganized, and fragile. Rarely are they orderly structured and neat like a square. I leave them out for both our sakes and I will put my conclusion which, despite the chaos it emerged from, I believe still to be valid.

Video games give a sense of control to the player unobtainable in real life. We like video games because in them we can be the attractive person that our genes have denied us. We can be brave and heroic and make all the decisions that we are too scared to make in this life. We can make choices without consequences, we can save and reload, save and reload or save and quit if we don't like whats going on. The player can also assume anything that can be done in game, his character can do.

All these things stand in contrast to real life. Life has no quit button, life has no save button. Life is big and scary and full of things which I can't do on my own or maybe ever. While real life has far more beauty, vitality and satisfaction, I've found it amazing how willing I am in my sinful state to sacrifice the beauty of lfe for the control of an alternate reality.

So does this mean video games are evil? no, not necessarily. It does mean that I've found an unhealthy desire within myself, a desire for control. This desire is so powerful that it would have me sacrifice real friendship, real joy, real godliness for the ability to control the destiny of a fictional character in a fictional world. That being the case I've decided not to simply cut out the video games. I don't want to simply remove myself from video games because that won't destroy the inner desire for control, it will only force the desire to find  another outlet. I'm going to use video games to punch this desire in the face and hopefully break its neck. This will mean playing video games for extremely short amounts of time and willing myself to stop when I find myself most seriously engaged in it. That's my plan anyway, hopefully in a month or to I'll have destroyed this particular desire and will be able to move on to something.


Thanks for reading. I suppose I'll warn you to look inside yourself for similar desires. I don't know if it looks the same in others as is in me but it seems logical to think that because we are made in the image of God, we'll probably want in some sense to have control in a way similar to how God has control. Because of our sinful nature this instinctive desire for control will express itself all wrong and is in drastic need of reform.

Question 3 From A Good Conversation

3. What would I do if I could not fail?

To begin with this question needs to be better defined. The original context of the question didn't allow for literally anything to happen. The question isn't asking, what would I do if I were God and could bend the laws of morality and physics or alter the nature of metaphysics and time. So within a reasonable human sense what would I do if I couldn't fail.

Still the possibilities are endless and exciting. Perhaps they are even more exciting now that we've quantified the question. Now, rather than asking "what would you do if you could do the impossible?" we are asking, "of all the things that are possible which would you like most to do?" This means that these following dreams are not mere fantasies but feasible goals which with proper effort and preparation could potentially become reality.

Fantasying about the impossible has it's place in a healthy personality. but more important in my opinion is to dream within the bounds of real life.  The world is full of powerful resources and no human being has maximized their potential. When you're willing to work hard and dream big and think rationally miracles can happen.

Now for an actual answer. If I could not fail, first I'll have a family of 8 children. I'll probably do this anyway but the assurance that I won't fail would certainly be a nice confidence boost. Secondly I'll learn to dance. I'll probably never do this unless my wife turns out to be a great dancer in which case she could teach me. Third, I'll be a king of some country and rule it with an iron fist. I'll certainly never do this unless some entirely unforeseen events alter the course of my life. Fourth, I'll become proficient enough in my knowledge of Plato, Augustine and Lewis to quote them like I can quote scripture. Fifth, I'd be a much more social person. I am really good at seeing things that are wrong. I'm not usually good at fixing them. I'm certainly trying to be a better communicator and a person better able to address the issues of my fellow human beings but knowing I wouldn't fail would be awesome. The possibility of failing makes it scary to try and help someone else because often I can leave the other person worse off than when I found them because I totally failed at being of any help.

I will publicly thank my anonymous friend who gave me the three question. Below is the ending theme song for an anime I watched earlier this week. Cool characters, awesome hair and an epic plot twist.

Question 2 From A Good Conversation

2. If a vampire bites a zombie will the zombie become a vampire or remain a zombie? or will it become some form of hybrid.

I had thought about writing a larger post about the plausibility of vampires and zombies actually being real. After thinking and doing some research I made the conclusion that whether vampires and zombies are real or not is too hard of a question for me. What I do know for sure though is this, if vampires or zombies do exist they are not the sort you see on TV. Most stories nowadays about vampires and zombies are just an authors imagination. Each author invents his own sort of vampire or zombie creature as they imagine or desire them to be and write a story. 

So to answer the question is difficult because which sort of vampire or zombie do we want to use? Do we use Stephanie Myers definition of vampire or John Polidor's? Do we look at the Walking Dead's idea of a zombie or World War Z's? It is not possible to come up with a true answer to the question. So I'll invent my own definition of vampire and a definition of a zombie and we'll answer the question based on my own imagination. 

Vampire: noun, a creature of supernatural origin created through an unlawful mixing of flesh and spirit resulting in an abomination both spiritual and natural. Most spiritual beings gain their life force from God. However God has separated Himself from vampires forcing them to gain their life force from something other than God. The most readily available source of life source is blood. However, some more powerful vampires can mine the spiritual power which God pours forth into His creatures. So while blood is most often the source of a vampires nutrition other sources are available. 

Zombies: noun, a corpse of a human being empowered to move through the influence of an outside source. Depending on what source is empowering them a zombie will do different things. In ancient times soldiers or slaves would be killed upon the death of their king. Spells would be placed over the bodies of these servants as a precaution. If the tomb was disturbed these bodies would arise and would destroy the disturbance. An apocalypse of zombies would require a power source far more advanced than the magic charms used to awaken a dead soldier to protect it's king. I don't foresee an apocalypse of zombies unless some new spiritual forces makes its way into our sector of the universe. 

Based on the above definitions I do not believe a vampire would bite a zombie. If however it were to happen two things might happen. The vampire would drain the power from whatever is giving the corpe ability to move. Or the vampire would be overwhelmed by the power within the zombie and become a creature under that power's control.